The Answer Is Always NO

Questions people asked me during the pledge drive: Do you have any horseradish?
No, it is not something I keep at the front desk.

On Halloween night a guy came running up to me as I was locking the front door.
"Will you be playing spooky music tonight?"
No, I suggest you step back and take your spooky breath and retire to the tent you live in behind the bar next door.

If I pay you a few extra dollars will you let me on the air to promote my band Not My Baby's show?
No, you get a mug. And I have a feeling it is your baby.

Have you ever experienced the warmth of the sun setting over a small South American village?
No, but I will gladly stuff you in a box and send you back to that village if you continue to regale me with your Peace Corps stories.


Why would you serve grapefruit juice? Don't you know that many medications react negatively with grapefruit juice. Are you trying to kill me?
I will make an exception. Yes, the answer to this one is yes.